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Post by willow on May 3, 2020 11:05:37 GMT
How do you tell the difference between an avoidant and someone who's just not that into you?
Also, with regards to the guys who pursue predominantly one night stands / casual sex without emotional connection - are they almost always DA? Are they ever secure?
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Post by serenity on May 6, 2020 20:56:45 GMT
How do you tell the difference between an avoidant and someone who's just not that into you?
Also, with regards to the guys who pursue predominantly one night stands / casual sex without emotional connection - are they almost always DA? Are they ever secure?
I found this article pretty spot on for describing how avoidants behave compared to others during courtship: www.loveaddictionhelp.com/signs-your-partner-is-love-avoidantIn my own experiences, avoidants come on strong and act totally in love with you for the honeymoon, then there is a 180 degree flip when the new relationship feelings wear off. Sometimes they completely discard you, sometimes they start to act hot and cold while they fade you out. Someone who is not into you will usually be distant right from the beginning, and unlikely to flirt or date you. |
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kelly
New Member
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Post by kelly on May 7, 2020 2:47:52 GMT
I do not think all avoidants come on strong in the beginning. Some may, but definitely not all. But that doesn’t mean they don’t show interest in you if they truly are interested in you. What I have noticed is that avoidants tend to leave or distance themselves after you’ve gotten closer. It can come from out of the blue and be very puzzling...until you know about attachment styles. Then the signs are often there. The push/pull, intermittent reinforcement and confusing behavior is what brought me here and prompted me to research. Someone who’s just not into you consistently shows you they aren’t (unless you provide them with sex). Someone who is not into you is not a puzzle. I never feel confused with those types.
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