Languishing. It is a concept that is being talked about a lot at the moment. It can be translated into a kind of sadness and is the feeling many of us are left with after our nervous systems have been on constant overwork for almost two years while caresses, hugs and closeness with other people have been on hold. Skin hunger is what experts call it and it goes much deeper than the touch itself. It is not a good combination. Many of us are left with a feeling of restlessness, immense fatigue and even a kind of mild depression that only shows up right here, where we gradually return to a normalcy and get enough peace to feel what overload our nervous system really has been through. This is where oxytocin comes into the picture. Oxytocin is the brain's natural nerve pill and essential for our sense of well-being. It is vital to our survival and attachment, and new mothers can spell oxytocin. When we lack oxytocin, we feel isolated and sad, and it may make good sense to look at what benefits oxytocin production to create better balance. Oxytocin is released when we hug someone we care about. It can also be promoted when we pet a pet (just look at how many have acquired a pet in the last two years) or otherwise have close, positive contact. In addition to the feeling of joy, oxytocin also has the calming effect on the body that many of us have lacked in the last few years.
A daily oxytocin shower A US study has shown that participants felt much more secure, confident, calm and socially capable after inhaling oxytocin. Their empathy also increased. In fact, the researchers behind a daily oxytocin shower recommended, not least when we are in deficit and have a nervous system working overtime.
Theres a special series of products called Uka. With them you can literally bathe in oxytocin. In addition to the fact that the very feeling of touch, when you spend a few minutes massaging the products into the skin or bathing in them, can have a beneficial effect on body and soul, certain scents have been shown to further enhance this feeling. And oh, what scents, imagine the finest blend of sensual ylang ylang, a touch of black pepper, a touch of sweet mandarin and a twist of sour yuzu. These products, which are aptly named Hug (they truly also feel like a hug to the skin) have been my own little daily oxytocin ritual for the last few years, where closeness and hugs have been reserved for the few. It has been many of yours too, but maybe you have never heard of them before or have forgotten what a good feeling they can give you. On a gray rainy day like today, they might as well do something good for you whether you feel decidedly sad or just a little (rainy) tired. And otherwise you will definitely be happy to have them on Monday morning. And Tuesday, Wednesday…
I went to birth preparation during my first pregnancy, great emphasis was placed on oxytocin and its absolutely crucial role in relation to labor pains and the progression of labor. The contractions of the uterus cause the body to secrete oxytocin which makes more contractions that produce more oxytocin - and conversely, if the body becomes stressed or scared, the contractions can stop due to lack of oxytocin '.
How did you think it into your second pregnancy? ‘I already knew halfway through my second pregnancy that I was going to have a planned cesarean section so I had plenty of time to prepare mentally. My husband and I did some rituals up to the date of the caesarean section with massage, good food and lots of caresses. We also worked with aromatherapy, so we could bring a cozy, familiar scent into the operating room, which is otherwise very clinical and cold. All in order to boost oxytocin production, which was not normally boosted via contractions.
' Whoch products helped you? ‘In my last trimester, I used the Hug products from Uka in the bath. The scent is composed specifically to set in motion the hugging hormone, and it is really nice and smells of closeness and the skin of a loved one. For our aromatherapy ritual, we used 24:45, also from Uka, which is actually a nail oil with aromatherapeutic properties.
' Did it work? ‘I don’t have any other caesareans to compare to than the one I’ve had, but it helped tremendously to ritualize the event and make it something very special in the ways we could. And to create a lot of positive associations around the birth of our second child. There, the smell of Uka 24:45 played a really big role.
Practise finding pleasure in your daily life. It is much more important for women to make sure to get pleasure than it is for men. The feminine is process oriented while the masculine is goal oriented
Play with the senses exersice: (all attatchmentstyles)
This is an effective way to get into the precent! It can also train your sensuality, and it's so valuable in your love life!
The sense of sight: · Close your eyes and put your hands over your eyes for a moment. Feel the eyes and the little muscles around the eyes · Remove hands and open your eyes slowly · Let your eyes look gently wherever they want. Do not stare, but let the visual impressions come to you · Just notice, that you are letting your eyes look, wherever they want · Use "looking gently" in your everyday life!
Hearing: · Notice the sounds around you without straining you. Let the sounds come to you · Just "watch" the sounds. You should not analyze, what they are or why, or if you like them or not · What do you notice right now inside you?
Taste: · Use your attention when you eat and drink (also, yes, especially your snacks, sweets, snacks, and beverages) · Do not do anything when you have something in your mouth! So no TV, PC or reading. Also try to eat in between without talking · Notice what you have in your mouth. How does it feel in the mouth and with tongue. How are you biting? How does it taste?
The sense of smell: · Stitch your nose in everything around you and smell. What does it smell like? · The world is rich in fragrances. Examine them and do not limit yourself to assess, what you like and do not like. Smell to yourself, others and everything around you ...
The sense of touch: · Examine everything around you: How does this feel when I touch it? Is it soft, hard, hot, cold, clumsy, sticky etc. · How does it feel on different parts of the body: the hands, lips and perhaps other areas of your body? · Also notice the air against your skin, for example the face and perhaps the arms
Touch yourself with a feather Selfhug Hugging a tree (Shooting guns) Hugging your friends / your partner / your kids Walking Laughing Petting an animal Getting pedicures and manicures Wear cashmere on your naked body Boodys homewear/night wear bamboo collection Wearing silk www.holisticsilk.com/products Getting a massage Giving gifts Sharing a meal Hot tub Shower Sipping hot tea Riding a roller coaster Paragliding / jumping out of an airplane Seeing an emotionel (teardripping) movie Drybrush your skin Guasha Singing Say the word "love" Social media Dancing with a partner or with yourself Give what you want to RECIEVE Watching a movie where people are making tender love with eachother Roll yourself into a blanket like a burrito
Seeing an emotionel (teardripping) movie Drybrush your skin m.youtube.com/watch?v=-WbGIQzovGs&t=71s youtu.be/pPA6_XxmAHc Dry bruch your face m.youtube.com/watch?v=7eGnjM7ElcE&t=9s youtu.be/jss1MHiiGu8 Selfcare massage for women - youtu.be/-Sf7CknsAZo Use a scalp brush - youtu.be/aR2tMp7NXcY Guasha Singing Say the word "love" Social media Dancing with a partner or with yourself Give what you want to RECIEVE Watching a movie where people are making tender love with eachother Sleep on bamboo sheets or silk sheets Sleep with a holistic silk pillow case - youtu.be/13I72lotZm0 Uka - youtu.be/Qd5de3TAjt0 Giving yourself a breast massage - youtu.be/hSQKujQ_r5g Heat a risebag and put it on your body, Heat a waterbottle and use it in bed / holistic silk with lavender - www.holisticsilk.com/Silk-Velvet-Hot-Water-Bottle Use neuroaffective touch pillows - youtu.be/YEaE-2GSt90 10 min sexy self practise m.youtube.com/watch?v=roNOrGCDw6s Soft head massage with different tools m.youtube.com/watch?v=0c-ockmOxFQ Hot stone massage youtu.be/_HQLsfZh5js - Hot Oil self massage How to massage your feet - youtu.be/NoVz7AvLybg Sea salt foot bath Holistic silk facemask Footmassage Give yourself a fasical massage youtu.be/nbKSrop818c Getting a hair cut
Naked carpet wiggles Weighted blanket Lay under a futon mattress Burrito roll yourself into a blanket Head scratcher Foam roller Warm laundry - Cuddle up next to, or burrow under Put fluffy blanket in dryer Electrical heating pad Hot water bottle Rice in a sock (warm in microwave) Acupressure mat Vibrate your whole body with a vibrator Laying in the grass feeling the earth holding you Leaning against or hugging a tree Touch your body with intention and love while bathing Salt or sugar scrub in the shower Acupressure ring Compression socks Roll tennis ball under feet Scratchy towels Heated eye masks A stone that feels good in your hand Build a nest in a tight space Orbeez (water beads) Hair claw clips Feathers / feather duster Fur (faux or otherwise) Lint brush Back scratcher
Attending to other senses:
Play soothing music, nature sounds or ambient noise Warm something that smells comforting to you (cinnamon, a candle you like, a dryer sheet, etc) Dim the lighting - no sharp or bright lights Make a cozy nook in your living room or bedroom:
You can set up a nest, a basket of feelie objects, put up a hammock or build a pillow fort. Your nook is for you... Use it to support your touch needs. When you have a spot already
Ways to be connected with a partner, a date, a cuddle buddy you can’t be near:
Send pictures of you touching your own body (sexy or not) Send pictures of what you’re snuggling up with Read to one another as you cuddle up on video chat One person instructs the other on how to touch their own body Sing to one another Experiment with the same kinds of touch at the same time
How can you send love or just kindness out into the world right now or today? 😍 What we focus on grows - love or just kindness can overcome fear and worry - inside you and in our world. The more we are, the more love ❤️💖💖
I would like to invite you to take a step right now for more love - just a tiny little one - what exactly do you want to do? - smile at those you meet (even if you do not know them)? 👏 - say something encouraging? - ask how the other is feeling? - give a little hand with something practical? - sing and song? - write a poem and post it? - call or visit someone who is lonely? - send love from your heart to a specific person, persons, areas of the world or the whole world ?