Thank you to the DAs on this board

I know there are not many of you here...but I for one so very much appreciate your postings and insight.

I am finally able to see that my mom and dad were (and are) in fact both DAs with me and that my mom's solution based approach of handling my needs, her extremely tight boundaries, her limited resources in her interactions with me (she also spoke of having a "meter" that got exhausted when she interacted with me) all speak to her attachment style and her way of addressing her fear and anxiety versus it truly being about a lack in me or something wrong about me that needs to be fixed.  I have been carrying this burden and misunderstanding my mom for decades.  I believe I now have additional insight into her world and my compassion for her is growing.  i believe I can now interact with her better and take things less personally since it isn't truly about me.  The best part is, I can see our relationship improving as it has been very much 2 boats passing each other.

Thank you Mary and LearningAlongTheWay and others who I just can't remember...you have really transformed my thinking.