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Post by tnr9 on Jun 15, 2018 11:46:58 GMT
I think it is incredibly helpful to share the small victories that we experienced. This week, I was able to speak clearly in another thread about who I am and my perspective on suffering being a choice. That felt incredibly vunerable but also empowering.
i also have to add that I have not felt triggered about B since Monday. I feel very much more in my adult space with an adult perspective of my love for him. Super proud of myself for that.
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Post by leavethelighton on Jul 1, 2018 23:54:53 GMT
Great work!
Small victory-- on a family vacation, I worked on being more flexible to help everyone's needs be met and to push past feeling rejected.
For example, there was a day I wanted to spend with my sister, she asked which of the two swimming pools I was planning on taking my kids to, and when I said pool A, she said she was going to go to pool B (we were staying in a complex that had multiple swimming pools in different locations). At first I felt hurt by her response because it made it clear she did not want to spend the day together-- we live on different continents normally and only see each other once every couple of years so it's hard for me when she doesn't want to really embrace that time.
Also, my kids really wanted to go to pool A so I didn't want to just go to pool B. In the past maybe I'd have felt so rejected by her response that I would have distanced myself for the rest of the day, but this time I took my kids to pool A for awhile and then when they were tired of it we joined my sister at pool B. Everyone got their desires met and I pushed past the rejection-feeling to spend time with her. There was still weirdness, but-- small victory.
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