Where is everyone

Maybe some of the posters wants to share what they did/how they have worked on themselves to become more secure in their relationships?
What are their chalkenges in a new/the same relationship?
To inspirere other posters.
I am querious ....

I am not currently in a relationship....I am still working through my feelings towards B, but have been better able to recognize the value in who I am and have been way more at ease with myself.  I think acceptance of self is key...and not in a narcissistic way...but one that says...this is who I am and where I am at and I am ok with it.  I no longer get angry at myself for the stories that pop into my head or the desires to check B’s page or pair him up with other girls.  Those are just protective responses that I learned at a far younger time that just got a bit stuck.  I do believe that many of us are just stuck in patterns of behavior we learned when we were younger that are coping mechanisms.  There is no blame, no need to rationalize it...it just is.  Once you accept who you are...you can then find ways to support those stuck places and learn new skills.  For instance, when I start creating stories...I allow myself to have them...I own them as stories..and then I ask...what do I need in this moment?  And most of the time...just accepting that I am going through this is enough to give me the ability to move past it.  That is where I am at...hope that helps.

I'm currently working a lot on my creative side, reading a lot of science fiction, writing, drawing, cooking. I recommend yet again The Artist's Way! It helped me to reconnect with myself. I focus on myself while also leaning on and taking care of my loved ones. I am nurturing significant relationships in my life in the healthiest ways I can.

When I think about the things that happened in my life that made me insecure, I try to frame them in a resolutive way. I feel things are falling into place, while also understanding sometimes they may not be things that I like or expect. Having solid grounds in my relationships and work are helping me to feel grounded. I'm making sense on the story of my life.

Frankly, my boyfriend has helped me a lot to get where am I. I feel he understands me and himself and has worked so much on his own feelings and actions. We have gotten to a healthy place. When a problem arises we are able to focus on the relationship and connection and while I can sense sometimes (on emotionally charged discussions) we lean towards our avoidance/anxiousness, we are able to reach a resolution without having a big argument (we struggled at first). We lean towards secure, as we've been working in trusting each other and focusing on the root of all. It also helps that we have been talking about our future moving in together, him being amazingly sweet making me part of his family in a way no one ever had (and it's very, very important for me). I really want to be secure with this man. He deserves the best version of me.