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Post by subzero on Jul 14, 2019 11:59:39 GMT
Hi guys,
I have just a quick question. Do you know how BPD relates to AP ? Basically, I had an ex girlfriend which clearly showed signs of AP i.e. really clinging, jealous, fear of abandoned and "quite" freakouts, often tired and needed to take a nap.
I did some research regarding AP and BPD and therefore my question:
- Do all APs have traits of Borderline or can it be seen separately ?
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Post by hannah99 on Jul 14, 2019 12:03:13 GMT
I think there are probably similar traits. Before I found out about attachment theory I thought I might have bpd.
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Post by subzero on Jul 14, 2019 12:16:53 GMT
Yes, I mean if you compare BPD and AP they really seem to congruent regarding self esteem etc.
But where would be the difference then?
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Post by hannah99 on Jul 14, 2019 12:21:01 GMT
I can't speak for all APs but my issues only tend to relate to my romantic partners and when I'm in a secure relationship my mental health is fine. I don't think that would be the case for people with bpd
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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2019 12:36:17 GMT
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hannah
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Post by hannah on Jul 14, 2019 14:38:43 GMT
I would say the same as sherry, that I see more links between BPD and FA. I read something about that the other day, if I find it I can post here.
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Post by lovebunny on Jul 15, 2019 12:39:36 GMT
I was with a woman on and off for 2 1/2 years who was Borderline. I learned firsthand it's an all-consuming disorder, it affected every aspect of her life. As wonderful as she could be at moments, she ultimately self sabotaged every job, every relationship, and frequently endangered her own health and safety. She clung to me for dear life, except when she was off on a drug binge or manic episode, during which she'd disappear for weeks (usually I'd eventually locate her by getting a call from the psyche ward.) She pushed my boundaries in every way attempting to get me to prove my love. I functioned more like a caregiver than a partner, and trying to extract myself from that relationship was a slow, drawn out, torturous endeavor. She stalked me. She showed up at my home suicidal. She called my mother and asked her to make me contact her.
I am an AP. When I was researching BPD in regards to my ex, I worried I may have some Borderline tendencies (oversensitivity to rejection and abandonment, mostly.) But what separates me from her seems to be my ability to empathize--I realize when I'm being dramatic and try to pull it back. She was more than willing to destroy the lives of those around her when she was feeling bad. She trashed my house once after a fight. She became physically violent. She self-harmed. These are not things, as an AP, I'm capable of. I have some ability to self-soothe, she had absolutely none.
There is probably some AP with BPD, but really, a BPD person struggles in every single aspect of their life, not just romance and relationships.
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Post by happyidiot on Jul 15, 2019 18:24:51 GMT
People with BPD do have one of the insecure and high anxiety attachment styles, but most insecure attachers don't have BPD. The types of attachment found to be most characteristic of BPD subjects are "unresolved" (another word for "disorganized" or FA basically), "preoccupied" (AP), and "fearful" (FA), according to a review of studies that examine the types of attachment found in individuals with BPD. I'm not sure why they've separated "unresolved" and "fearful," it's a bit challenging/confusing because of the fact that different researchers use different words I guess. Here is that review: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1857277/
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Post by toorational on Jul 19, 2019 19:50:20 GMT
Can't speak for all APs obviously but I'm AP but far from BPD. I know what a BPD is like, my ex GF was one (diagnosed by a psychiatrist). My AP problem triggers all kinds of emotions but I'm very good a controlling them and not letting them escape. A person with BPD on the other hand can't control his emotions very well and is very prone to outbursts, fights, etc. A mix of AP and BPD must really not be fun to be around. Probably what is referred to as "crazy" gf or bf.
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Post by subzero on Jul 19, 2019 22:22:00 GMT
Thanks guys for all your replies - yes, I suppose Borderline or quite Borderline is another dimension.
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