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Post by trickyone on Jul 9, 2017 21:17:28 GMT
So after a year's relationship with a few hiccups on the way my ex told me he didn't want us to be together and couldn't understand why I waited around for him. Recently I got together romantically with a friend, although it hasn't turned into anything serious. When I saw him my ex wanted to know exactly what had happened with this friend and behaved as if he was jealous. How can that be? He made it very clear he didn't want to be with me. is that normal FA behaviour?
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Post by mrscuba on Jul 11, 2017 14:08:38 GMT
So after a year's relationship with a few hiccups on the way my ex told me he didn't want us to be together and couldn't understand why I waited around for him. Recently I got together romantically with a friend, although it hasn't turned into anything serious. When I saw him my ex wanted to know exactly what had happened with this friend and behaved as if he was jealous. How can that be? He made it very clear he didn't want to be with me. is that normal FA behaviour? Your ex may be an avoidant but it doesn't mean he didn't have feelings for you ever. Deep down I find many of them truly want relationships but their body's literally get that creepy cringe feeling when they feel closeness that suffocates them. If they are fearful avoidant they usually don't always want to end relationships but they want it on their terms which is often why I see so many break ups followed by reconciliation. By you being with this guy things may not be on his terms or maybe he doesn't feel a sense of control/security that maybe he onc fell. Avoidants all display similarities in behavior when it comes to interpersonal relationships.... but they are all still different people that react to things differently. Don't forget that some guys are more territorial than others so a lot of men would feel jealous in a situation like that. In the end, I guess your ex made their decision and regardless of their actions and feelings now I wouldn't allow that to prevent you from pursuing a good and healthy relationship. |
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Post by trickyone on Jul 11, 2017 19:46:30 GMT
Thanks mrscuba for the insight, he said he loved me unprompted several times, but kept adding that we were just casual. I finally took him at his word after being pushed away too many times, I still love him and want to support him but can't do much unless he decides to work on himself or gets support from elsewhere (he admits he pushes people away and can't really explain his feelings).
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Post by fatalcharm on Jul 15, 2017 2:11:03 GMT
A defining characteristic of being FA is that they themselves don't know what they're feeling. They are so out of touch with their emotions that they find it hard to identify and label what they are feeling, and what feels like love on monday can feel like anxiety on tuesday. They are just as confused about their feelings as you are.
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Post by mrscuba on Jul 27, 2017 11:51:39 GMT
A defining characteristic of being FA is that they themselves don't know what they're feeling. They are so out of touch with their emotions that they find it hard to identify and label what they are feeling, and what feels like love on monday can feel like anxiety on tuesday. They are just as confused about their feelings as you are. "They are so out of touch with their emotions that they find it hard to identify and label what they are feeling, and what feels like love on monday can feel like anxiety on tuesday. They are just as confused about their feelings as you are" BINGO! You hit the nail so hard on the head it went straight through the wood and into the ground!!! |
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