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Post by mitchhed on Jan 1, 2018 2:57:48 GMT
I just have to talk about this real quick. We're having a party tonight and unknown to me, my DA ex was invited. When I came downstairs after I heard people arriving, I rounded the corner and there she was. She smiled at me but I didn't say anything. I proceeded to not talk to her for the few hours she was here. Finally, she just left with her kids. I feel relieved she's gone but I also feel like a jerk for not at least saying hello. I really don't like being like this. It's not me. I get along with everyone. But i also know this is very painful, just being around her still. Its been 6 months and the healing process feels real slow for me. This sucks
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Post by tnr9 on Jan 1, 2018 3:32:39 GMT
I just have to talk about this real quick. We're having a party tonight and unknown to me, my DA ex was invited. When I came downstairs after I heard people arriving, I rounded the corner and there she was. She smiled at me but I didn't say anything. I proceeded to not talk to her for the few hours she was here. Finally, she just left with her kids. I feel relieved she's gone but I also feel like a jerk for not at least saying hello. I really don't like being like this. It's not me. I get along with everyone. But i also know this is very painful, just being around her still. Its been 6 months and the healing process feels real slow for me. This sucks It has been 8 months for me and I feel like my heart hasn't budged an inch. Last year I spent New Year's Eve with my ex....so it is especially hard tonight. I think it is important that you remember you had no opportunity to prepare for her being there tonight and I think it may have been worse trying to fake niceties rather then just owning how awkward the situation was and just avoiding the interactions altogether. Believe me...our hearts heal in their own time....so it is best just to own the suckiness of it all. Here is to further healing in 2018. |
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Post by mitchhed on Jan 1, 2018 5:25:32 GMT
Thanks bud. But this just brought everything back for me. We did a lot together in a short time. She actually did share some beautiful things about herself with me. But that dark side, I find it very strange to comprehend
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Post by tnr9 on Jan 1, 2018 12:54:50 GMT
Thanks bud. But this just brought everything back for me. We did a lot together in a short time. She actually did share some beautiful things about herself with me. But that dark side, I find it very strange to comprehend I am sure it did....and it is ok to grieve the beautiful aspects. Don't linger too long on the "darker aspects" that were hard for you to comprehend...our minds definately don't like it when something doesn't make sense...but focusing on her won't change anything. I hope your 2018 goes better.  |
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Post by scarlett on Jan 1, 2018 22:48:13 GMT
Thanks bud. But this just brought everything back for me. We did a lot together in a short time. She actually did share some beautiful things about herself with me. But that dark side, I find it very strange to comprehend That's the hardest part about all of this...nothing makes any sense. I'll tell you what, though, it's amazing that we have a name for it because I just learned about this. Not knowing that this type of behavior is an actual "thing" is thee worst ever. I'm trying to heal from one, too...I get it. I think just reading about these types makes me understand how even though I love this person, I'll never, ever get what I want and to be honest, that's an AWFUL way to live. |
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