Lola
Junior Member
Posts: 71 
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Post by Lola on Jan 20, 2018 19:25:54 GMT
We are not who we think we are. We shift between two different states of mind- the conscious and the unconscious. Until we establish that we are our conscious, and our unconscious is the motor works of our body we will believe that our sensory receptors, flight or fight reactions, and heuristics are us, that's not true. For example, if a car is driving really fast towards you and scares you so much that months later you are very cautious crossing the road, that doesn't mean that you are a car fearing person. That means that you are more aware of cars. That was a stupid example to illustrate that we HAVE an attachment style, but we are not the attachment style. If we are not careful we can allow our autopilot senses take over and become temporarily someone we don't recognize. Insecurity in relationships only makes you more aware of the smallest details and may make you vulnerable to incorrect assumptions.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jan 22, 2018 23:52:03 GMT
I think that was beautifully illustrated! You are aware of the damage a car can do, so you look both ways before you cross the street. There is nothing at all wrong with being cautious to safely cross the street.
Maybe completely off from what you are illustrating but your example gave me a visual of my own.
I imagine a couple approaching a cross walk hand in hand. The button is pushed and they start out walking across the street. All is safe until the walk signal and the little man starts bilking, or the digital count down starts.
One or both start to panic. They let go of one another's hands. One person is so terrified of the potential oncoming traffic that they run back to where they started and choose to wait for someone else to come along to cross the street with, but what the same thing will happen each time. That person will hit the button, and then start over only getting half way across each time.
The other person is panicking too. They stand frozen in the middle of the street. Watching time run out. As soon as that light is green those car are going to hit them! They see their partner standing by the button where the two started out, shouting to the one in the middle of the cross walk, "You've got to move along! Go, Go!" But instead ofcontinuing to walk to the other side of the street, they stand looking at their partner and saying, "What? Why! Why are you back over there!" as the cars start to rev their engines.
The goal is to get across the street together. It doesn't mean it won't cause a little anxiety, a little can be good to keep us on our toes, but when the little digital man starts to blink, the couple needs to hold hands a bit tighter, maybe step up the pace and keep moving forward. That's the only way to get across the street together.
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