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Post by ocarina on Feb 3, 2018 14:01:01 GMT
Has anyone been following this: yourpersonality.net/attachment/logout.phpI have been doing these monthly for the last five months and it's interesting stuff - for me, my avoidance with my mother and my ex partner DA with mother and FA with ex have remained static, but openness and security have generally increased as have satisfaction with life. It's an interesting way of logging your journey so to speak. I can see that my avoidance tends to be triggered by people who have proved themselves unreliable in the past whilst with close friends and life in general I come out well within the secure. The site reminds you monthly to redo the survey. I think for me it's taken a good 6 months to begin to undo the harm that I brought to myself by remaining in a relationship that was damaging me. Reading this and my past surveys is a good reminder and also that some of my avoidant behaviour is probably pure self preservation! |
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Post by yasmin on Feb 3, 2018 14:42:37 GMT
I come back on this test as securely attached to friendships (100% actually) fairly DA to parents, and on the border of FA / AP with relationships but I find that moves quite a lot depending on what's going on!
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Post by ocarina on Feb 3, 2018 14:49:40 GMT
I come back on this test as securely attached to friendships (100% actually) fairly DA to parents, and on the border of FA / AP with relationships but I find that moves quite a lot depending on what's going on! It sounds asthough we have pretty similar styles Yasmin and perhaps something of a similar story too! I read your recent post on the good things about your last relationships and could really relate to the peace of being with someone who has some of the same traits - the quiet lack of drama. I would like nothing more than to find someone similar to me as a partner - requiring space and intimacy in equal measure - seems these are rare people! |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 3, 2018 14:58:53 GMT
when i took the test i came back 100% secure in friendships, some FA to parents, and right on the border DA/Secure with partner. Had i taken this a long time ago it would have been very different haha! A lot of work over a long period of time has brought me close to secure with a partner- considering the massive trauma history i feel encouraged about that. I used to be very avoidant in friendships too. I believe that was because of growing up as a scapegoat. Not sure. Onward!  I’ll take the test again soon just to see what’s up. |
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Post by alpenglow on Feb 3, 2018 17:18:05 GMT
I love that website. There are a lot more interesting personality tests there was well, besides the one on attachment.
I'm very secure with friends, somewhat dismissive with my mum (had my dad still been alive, it would have been fearful), and very anxious in relationships (AP here).
No change over the years, it's been dead stable, unfortunately... But I haven't been in a new relationship for many years, so results might be different. Still very anxious in the early stages of dating though.
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Post by yasmin on Feb 3, 2018 19:55:20 GMT
I come back on this test as securely attached to friendships (100% actually) fairly DA to parents, and on the border of FA / AP with relationships but I find that moves quite a lot depending on what's going on! It sounds asthough we have pretty similar styles Yasmin and perhaps something of a similar story too! I read your recent post on the good things about your last relationships and could really relate to the peace of being with someone who has some of the same traits - the quiet lack of drama. I would like nothing more than to find someone similar to me as a partner - requiring space and intimacy in equal measure - seems these are rare people! Yes. We had similar feelings in childhood! Very interesting how this translates. Is really like to focus on bringing down my anxiety levels. I'm hardly aware they are there because I can get so emotionally detached |
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I’ll take the test again soon just to see what’s up. 
