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Post by fatalcharm on Feb 13, 2018 20:16:00 GMT
Just wondering... Do you hate it? Do you feel pressured? Triggered?
Last V-Day I made and emailed a cute romantic video for my then-GF (long distance relationship) and she didn't even respond to it. I also had beautiful flowers delivered to her and she texted me a "polite" thank you devoid of any emotions - Not even "happy valentine's day" in the text. Not even a phone call that evening or for the next week... She also made plans in advance for the following weekend so we wouldn't be able to get together. Is this typical?
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Post by ocarina on Feb 13, 2018 20:47:12 GMT
Just wondering... Do you hate it? Do you feel pressured? Triggered? Last V-Day I made and emailed a cute romantic video for my then-GF (long distance relationship) and she didn't even respond to it. I also had beautiful flowers delivered to her and she texted me a "polite" thank you devoid of any emotions - Not even "happy valentine's day" in the text. Not even a phone call that evening or for the next week... She also made plans in advance for the following weekend so we wouldn't be able to get together. Is this typical? Not sure if this is a FA thing or just me - but I feel pressured by dates that make me feel I need to perform - ie New Years Eve, Valentines day - and too many gifts can make me feel smothered - although it's a fine line as some gentle kindness and the occasional flowers etc are lovely. I can remember my Ex pre first valentines day - I could see he was sizing me up to see if I required anything extra or special because of the date - I didn't and therefore the date went by without anything special and this pattern continued. I have to say a cute romantic video wouldn't do it for me - but that may be personal not avoidant. |
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Post by yasmin on Feb 13, 2018 23:53:50 GMT
I don't really have feelings on it either way
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Post by mrob on Feb 17, 2018 16:14:27 GMT
The thought of Valentines Day, even Christmas just scares the life out of me. I've got to know somebody well enough to get them a present they'll like. My ex wife would get presents every second week from her family on the other side of the world. I felt really overwhelmed and that there was no room for me. Nothing I could get was good enough, thoughtful enough, or a surprise because of real time access to account balances. A lot of that is rubbish, but it's certainly how I felt at the time.
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Post by Jaeger on Feb 17, 2018 19:46:26 GMT
I don't like it because to me it's capitalist BS. If you need a special day to treat someone the way you should treat them year round, I think that's a problem in itself.
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Post by alpenglow on Feb 17, 2018 21:18:38 GMT
I don't like it because to me it's capitalist BS. If you need a special day to treat someone the way you should treat them year round, I think that's a problem in itself. I share the exact same view. |
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Post by gaynxious on Mar 2, 2018 23:06:13 GMT
I think my ex was FA and he generally had no problem with Valentines day. He lavished me with gifts every year even when we had only been together for a few months. Even when we were so busy we would decide together to do Valentine's dinner the following weekend I would find presents left to surprise me on the actual day. Was one of the few things that really made me feel grateful for our relationship. Christmas we just both hated trying to figure out what to get each other so for 10 years we literally just agreed not to exchange presents. Birthdays too.
Interestingly for the last two Valentine's days my ex seems to get official with whoever he is seeing right before or on Valentine's Day.
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Post by tnr9 on Mar 14, 2018 0:02:39 GMT
Valentine's Day was actually really special...just the two of us, he took the day off and made me dinner. I have such fond memories of that day.
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