Update on "I dumped Her" - She is back with her EX

I broke up with her only because I caught her lying to me. I did not want it to end. Clearly she was working things out with the ex. You’re right, my hurt inner child is angry 😉

I agree with you but I don’t know what else I can do. I’ve tried all types of therapy. Multiple therapists and even went to do a psychedelic drug to work on this stuff but it hasn’t gone away. Granted this would have made me suicidal a few years ago. Now I’m just sad for a few weeks. Unfortunately I don’t think there will ever be a way for me to heal these deep rooted abandonment issues.

I hope this gives you the clarity you need to move on.

In some of these cases, what I read doesn't sound like love. It sounds like obsession. If you cared about this woman truly then you would definitely want her to be happy.

You'll never be happy unless what you want is someone who wants and loves you back.

Obsessing so much about someone who doesn't return it feels like avoidance.

It's a way to avoid really having a loving and reciprocal relationship.

You're so fixated on the past or the impossible that it frees you from actually living.

I can understand being a bit obsessed or depressed at the end of a long relationship or marriage - but reating like this and giving so much of your life to a 16 or 17 week relationship wit someone emotionally unavailable?

Ahh. You will be old one day and regret it.

Have fun. Go out. Meet a girl who's available and thinks you're awesome.

Stop stalking her on social media and go out have fun, start a new hobby, practice a sport, whatever you can do to fill your mind, move your body, meet different people.
I know it sounds easy for me saying this from here but I have been there many times.
You need to release.
Be excited, jump for joy, now you are free to meet someone more compatible with you. Now you have more insight into your own wounds and behaviour. Now you know better what you want and what you don’t want. It’s a reason to celebrate!
Imagine how many women are out there in the world. Why fixate in this one? She wasn’t making you feel happy, valued and loved anyway.
Thank her (from your heart to hers, no need to contact) for the good times you shared and let go.
Wish to others (especially your ‘enemies’) whatever you want to have in your own life. It will come back like a boomerang.
Each failed romantic relationship is one or more steps towards a better one.

I was surprisingly more hurt than I should be after ending a three-month relationship with my FA ex. I didn’t want anything bad happened to him. I just felt angry. For him treating me the way he did. His fault finding. How things ended. I also didn’t have any prior experience dealing with an extremely insecure guy who hurt my self esteem so much by judging me so badly.

In a way I guess we both need to ask ourselves why we are so hurt by someone we only dated for a few months. I know the intensity of the relationship plays a role too but I feel that i really should’nt have had invested so much so soon.

I didn’t have strong chemistry with him in the first place but I felt the most comfortable with him both emotionally and physically and I hadn’t felt that in a long time. I got sooo excited and anxious as he was so keen to have a relationship with me right from the start. It took me two years to actually find someone who I could date exclusively and I was terrified that it’ll take me another two years to find someone again.

There really isn’t a point for you to compare yourself with her ex husband. If she had completely moved on, you wouldn’t even have to worry about him. The fact that he’s a pro athlete means nothing to your relationship with her. No matter who you meet in the future, there’s always an ex who had a strong bond with them. The min I find out I have to “compete” with that bond, I’ll nope the fuck out.