Yep, heres the thread
jebkinnisonforum.com/thread/1268/flirting-jealousy-lies-infidelityIt can be a trauma responce, which can be landed with a somatic experience attatcment therapist
The problem is, if we are getting caught in the trauma whirlwind and we can’t stop it (often with SE tools and with the help of other people/our partner), we have to go all the way through the trauma whirlwind in order to get out on the other side
Your “why don’t you marry her” comment made me smile - I smiled with you, not at you, because I have sometimes felt jealous myself
If you have had something to drink, it can make it more difficult to control your instinctive reactions
I know a woman, former desorganized, who is together with a secure guy - she dosent drink anymore, because then she’s at risk making drama with her instinctive reactions…
You can also look at the inner child stages. E.g. Has something happend to you when you were around 5-7 years old where you felt that you were not being part of the group, were you bullied ect. ?
I still like the couple bubble suggestion by Stan Tatkin
Does it feel like he/they are forgetting that you are there ?
How can you come out of a freeze do you think ? Can he help you ?
- there are some techniques in the healing disorganized thread and in the regulating the nervous system thread
Maybe your therapist have given you some techniques ?
How can the two of you deal with this in the future ?
Another thing a male therapist once told me was, that when men are bonding over something with a more masculine leaning woman, he sees her as being one of the guys, but he doesn’t want to date her, expecially if his partner is more feminine leaning
If She is flirting with your boyfriend, Then I personally like Mathew Husseys suggestion
youtu.be/yPZAxiupSboShe could also be an energy vampire, and that is draining
You can also try to do some shadow work - why is she such a pain in the ass ?
And maybe with your boyfriend - he is maybe not as introverted as you thought he was ? Maybe you dident see it in the crushing phase or maybe you saw it and thought it was cool, but now it’s becoming annoying?
jebkinnisonforum.com/thread/1247/shadow-work
