Oh and then - leave it up to the universe - a guy I had a fling with in college who I *never would have remembered in a million years* wrote me on FB. It's been 26 years? We had a fling. I don't even think I liked him then. I had to ask another friend who he was, then I started putting it together. I asked him what made me think of me after all these years and he gave me his number. Ugh. No.
At least you tried! And you recognize that these guys are all ridiculous instead of trying to twist yourself just to make something work, which is actually good. I have to admit too... those okc messages are so incredibly absurd that I got a good laugh. Who thinks talking about their relationship with their ex and being pissed off about not getting transactional sex is a good way to start off?
I'm sorry you've had such bad experiences lately, and I don't blame you for deleting your accounts. But keep that vision you had of what you actually want in a partner, because then if you do happen to organically meet a guy who would be a better and healthy match for you, you'll recognize it.
Thanks Alexandra - and thanks so much for all of your continued support I'm glad you had a good laugh. I mean. Wow.
I end up talking to guys I wouldn't normally look at/talk to just because they can *put a sentence together* like it feels like a tall glass of water after a trek in a desert .... which is why I'm getting off sites b/c I don't feel like I can make clear decisions. I have worse, bad, and more worse to choose from. And "just okay"
And if the one rare orchid comes along, there are like 27 hotter women clamoring for it and I don't stand a chance.
What's weird though is the one guy I think of who I "could have" met in person - maybe. Was from pre-pandemic at our local coffee shop. I used to LOVE seeing him in there in the morning (I went every day) and sometimes making eye contact, wondering if he was single, etc. etc. and he was my reference point to "oh, it's possible to meet someone OUTSIDE of online dating." Well almost a year later (to the day) well into the pandemic, and all thoughts of that are gone - the coffee shop is closed, except for take-out, I don't go there anymore, etc. etc. But I thought - well, the universe is going to have to come up with *something* because it's not going to be online dating. And wouldn't you know, I go to take my dog to the get his nails trimmed at the groomer today, and I'm walking down the street, and there's the guy - on line - outside the coffee shop. I tried to get him to see me! But he wasn't turning his head around - literally the one time I hoped my dog would BARK! (he barks nonstop - and there was another guy there with a dog) and he didn't. Oh well. But we all have masks on etc - which, I have to say, may make it easier! - lol. Since I never did have the nerve to talk to him.
So perhaps one wednesday at 9 I'll be there again - or book another groomer appointment.