You are doing the disches and your partner comes up behind you and wants sex:
You can say:
"Im sencing that you are kind of aroused right now. I would like to be intimate with you. Where are you at the arousel scale from 1-10 ? And where am I myself ? What can we do xxx so that we can meet eachother ....at the same level
If you are at level 1 and your partner is at level 7, you can ask your partner to check in with you later or you can ask if you both can start on level 1.
Shaming your partner is a shut down. If you are repulsed, then find out what is repulsing you. (Women can roll their eyes, say where did you get this idea - from porn ? ect.......) Don’t communicate the repulsion. Communicate what YOU would like. This gets you back into your
Me .and my boyfriend just had sex and then he moves away and I just want to cuddle. What is going on ?
When men are having sex their testoron level drops and they get more estrogen. He moves away in order to build up his testoron again Men with a lot of tetostorone will not get bonded as fast by having sex.
On the other hand most women produce oxytocin (the bonding hormone) when having sex and thats why they often wants to cuddle, spoon and maybe talk after having sex
After menopause, women will be less affected by oxytocin
It's about creating desire in your life. To feed your lust/desire energy - not your craving
You can nourish your feminine energy / your masculine energy
You can build up the sexual energy with yin breathing (yang breathing)
Look at what drains your desire? 1) Stress drains your lust/desire 2) When you yourself or others exceed your limits - e.g. you have sex even if you do not want to 3) Anger 4) Grief
If you do not stand by your limits, organic anger arises in your system
Tip: 3 times a week have a sex date with yourself Give yourself self-pleasure 30 min in a delicious room, with music, candels, sentcandles ect. Touch yourself in a sensual/sexual way - do NOT use a vibrator Use the last 5 min to integrate Music sugesstion - Je taime - youtu.be/k3Fa4lOQfbA - Sexual healing - youtu.be/rjlSiASsUIs
This is expecially important for women but also for men
Too many people - both women and men - give away their power sexually, by having to use something from the outside to be able to activate and get in touch with their lust, horniness and arousal.
We need either porn, vibrators or each other to achieve total satisfaction. We tell ourselves…: "You have to turn me on. You do not turn me on. This does not turn me on. This turns me on."
When you take your sexual power back to yourself, you turn yourself on.
I see this time and time again in clients, who can not make love to themselves because they are bored or they feel it is strange. Or singles who say "I have no partner", as if that is a criteria for a good sex life.
In the relationship, it can show as if we are entitled to be satisfied by each other and when that does not happen, we walk around feeling angry or feeling rejected. But that does not have to be the case. We do not lack anything, we are perfect as we are.
You can become your own best lover.
To love oneself is the foundation of all sexuality. It's one of the best ways to love yourself.
Not the fast masturbation that chases an orgasm. Both men and women can tend to chase the orgasm, men often through the use of porn, where they completely forget to feel their own body and penis and women's use of vibrators that gives them the expectation, that the orgasm should come within two minutes . Masturbation turns into a quick ejaculation, something that should not take too long and this will reflect our sex life.
There's nothing wrong with either porn or vibrators, but it's the way we use it, that's the problem. We need to want the conscious masturbation, the one that increases our sexual energy and where the whole body is at play.
Conscious lovemaking with ourselves is where we give ourselves time to caress our whole body, use our breathing, feel and be present in the now. We allow our horniness to take over and celebrate our lust and sexuality.
I often get the question, what is the best way to masturbate?
There is no right way to mastubate. We are all different and we have our own preferences. Some like it hard and fast others like it soft and sensual.
Who are you as a sexual human being. What are you longing for and can you give it to yourself ?
Wait to have sex with the one you date until you can't help it any longer. Don't have sex on the first dates. Wait from the 2nd date up to 3 months.
Remember A bad sex match can, however, be a dealbreaker if sex is important to you.
Remember the first date is just an appetizer. If you are having sex too fast, the steam can go off the relationship. As long as you don't know the other person, believe yourself. In 3 months you can investigate if the other person is a partner for you. Both partners must be enriched by the relationship.
Remember the impact of oxytocin - expecialy if you are a woman. Oxytocin makes women bond, when they are making love and they are touched on the breats and on the nipples. On the other hand: Mens testosteron can block the intake of oxytocin. It is better to cuddle, kiss ect and not just jump into bed with a man right away.
As a Woman make sure That You are exclusive before You are having sex. Make sure That both of You put your datingprofiles on pause ect. Otherwice wait.....
Use a condom until both of You have been tested.
Needs behind sex
Pure lust oxytocin Feeling masculine / feminine Confirmation - Correctness of the Love / the Relationship - Physically My Body Is Delicious - Inadequate Self-esteem Admiration - being a good lover Power - you can't do without me Discharge ANS the nervous system Experience intimacy / closeness
.Some) women are often surprised to learn that men love it when women initiate sex. Many women are surprised to hear this because they have been turned down so many times. Or at least they think that's what happend. In speakning to their partners we found out that the men dident even know that they have been invited for sex. Why ? Because how she invited him, dident register. He never even knew she was indicating a desire for sex.
One of the most important things to work out in a relationship is your "signal". How do you indicate a desire for sex ? Does your partner know that's what that means ? If you've ever felt like it was ignored there's a good change he or she dident know what it was. The question to to ask each other is: “what's a good way to let you know that I'd like to have sex ?" Once you know each others signals - wether it's high heels, a balloon tied to the bed or a direct statement like "I want you bad" - there's a much better change you'll connect
1. Increased lubrication Quite obviously, blood equals more lubricating fluid, which may make penetrative sex more comfortable.
2. Protection from unwanted pregnancy According to fertility science, the first three days of your period are considered infertile days, which means you can have penis and vagina action without any worry of unwanted pregnancy. After the first three days of your period, estrogen levels start to rise again, which means ovulation (and the possibility of pregnancy) may be near. Sperm can stay alive inside the vagina for 3 – 5 days, so if you want to prevent unwanted pregnancy, it’s best to play it safe and use your contraceptive method of choice after the first three days of your period.
3. Increased feelings of openness and possible rise in libido Interestingly enough, researchers don’t have a scientific explanation for the rise in libido many women report during their periods. But after working with thousands of womben from all over the world, I have a hunch. When we’re menstruating, we are the most energetically open phase in our entire menstrual cycle. When having sex with the right partner, our heightened sensitivity and emotional rawness can lead to deeply spiritual and powerful orgasmic openings through sex.
Cons of Period Sex
1. Contradicts the purpose of menstrual blood Despite what the patriarchy has programmed us to believe, menstrual blood is not dirty, smelly, or shameful. It’s medicine. And by that, it’s antimicrobial and antibacterial. One of the benefits of a menstrual bleed is that it cleanses foreign bacteria and microbes brought in by foreign objects like fingers, tongues, penises, and vaginas. When we have sex on our period, we are disrupting the cleansing process of menstrual blood.
2. Disrupts downward flow of life-force energy According to the ancient Eastern sciences of Yoga and Ayurveda, the sole focus of our body during our period is detoxification. The energetic, physical, and emotional cleansing that takes place during our menstrual phase is due to the dominance of apana prana or apana vayu, which means downward moving pranic-force or downward moving pranic wind. In order to experience the full benefits of this full-being detoxification, it should be undisturbed and uninterrupted by activities like sex that can change the flow of energy.
Now that you know the pros and cons of period sex, what do you feel is right for you? .
One of the most common symptoms of menopause is decreased sex drive. Up to 80% of all women experience it to a greater or lesser degree - and there are probably many. But should one just accept that this is how it is to grow older or is it a myth that this is just the way it is? The answer to the two questions is no and yes. No we should not accept that this is the way it is and yes it is a myth. But why are so many people experiencing it? It is a common belief that decreased sex drive can occur when the hormones begin to decline. Here we are talking mainly estrogen and testosterone but also neurotransmitters such as dopamine. These drugs all have something to do with sex drive. But the declining hormones we can in principle live with. Not all women notice discomfort from the falling hormones and over time the body usually gets used to the amount of hormones being reduced But what the body can not handle is stress from several fronts. Menopause is stressful for the body and if there are many other stressful factors at play such as poor lifestyle (read: lack of exercise, poor diet, lack of sleep and self-care) yes then the body simply can not produce enough hormones to keep you in balance . And what can happen then? The sex drive decreases - or disappears.
Menopause is not necessarily the villain So it does not have to be menopause that like a thief at night steals your sex drive. In fact, it may rather be your body telling you that it has been on overtime for far too long. All this statistics and surveys do not tell about and they only add fuel to the fire that menopause is a nasty place to be because all joy, pleasure, juice and power disappear as soon as we feel the first heat ride. NOT TRUE !!! It is possible to maintain his desire and to have great sex even during menopause. It only requires 4 things (and I say that with a twinkle in my eye because it is not really 4 easy things but it is absolutely affordable things): Knowledge of what happens in menopause with the connection between brain and abdomen Knowledge of how you can work with your body and the changes that occur naturally Desire and courage to work with your sexuality Desire and motivation to change what stands in the way of the desire can unfold perhaps in new ways
Stress and sex drive Stress is one of the biggest root causes of decreased sex drive during menopause, but desire and the desire to feel like it can also be affected by many other things. You can work with your desire and get the desire back. The happy message is that you can rediscover your sex drive if it has disappeared and you can do it in a completely natural way and if you feel like it, for your own sake, there is so much great to be gained by going inside in the process it is finding the key to one's own desire and what turns on the spark again. As a sexologist says: If your appetite disappeared, you would not stop eating either. You know you need nourishment and we also need sexuality and intimacy even if the desire is not quite as it used to be ”.
Good advice for rediscovering your sex drive To rediscover the desire for sex, it is important to want to want - to be motivated for one's own sake. Not for your partners sake and to save the relationship. It can of course be a very powerful motivation but it is not the one that makes you come in contact with your desire. That motivation is more fear-based. And desire does not come from fear. Desire comes from trust and a desire for closeness. Sex has many beneficial effects on our entire physiology, for example on our circulation, our immune system, our pelvic floor and our mood. But it is also important for our relationships and our relationship to each other and to ourselves. Sex creates connection, creates closeness and it is an important ingredient in a well-functioning relationship. Not that a relationship can not exist without but sexuality is an innate impulse and it is an important part of our identity and life force. If not kept alive, an important source of energy and vitality and an important connection to our own inner core and spark fades. Sexuality is inextricably linked to our creativity and therefore there is much to be gained by stimulating and strengthening one's sexuality.
There are a handful of tips that can help you strengthen your sex drive:
Move - daily exercise is important for your whole body Squeeze exercises - creates blood flow and you can better feel what is happening Make sure you sleep a minimum of 8 hours each night Stimulate your desire with a vibrator, for example every day in the bath (not solo sex but just stimulation of the area around the labia and clitoris). Provide a healthy and nutritious diet Reduce stress Get a 360 degree view of how your body is doing and get a personal plan to support your body's any imbalances so your body can form the hormones it needs and can.
How are you feeling? One last thing that is important to get around when it comes to decreased sex drive is to look at your life. As mentioned, decreased sex drive is not just about altered hormones. It can also be about your relationship and the sex you have. It is not uncommon for the sensitivity and “flammability” to change due to the physiological changes that occur in the area around the vagina, labia and clitoris and therefore it may take more to be turned on or maybe something completely different is needed. It may also be that the sex you have had has not really been the sex you dream of or has the degree of intimacy that you long for. And when it gets harder to turn you on, it's not really that strange that the desire is absent. It is simply not attractive to have sex because it does not give you anything. It could also be that outside the bedroom there are things you are not completely happy with. If you do not feel heard, seen, met and have other needs covered than just sex, it can also affect the desire. Your desire is also greatly affected by what happens between you and your partner in everyday life and a partner who is not there for you can extinguish much of the spark.
A few good questions you can ask yourself are: Are you happy and content, do you thrive in your relationship, do you get your needs met? Are you happy with the sex you have or do you feel a longing for something deeper, closer or just something completely different? Does your partner turn you on? Do you want sex but just not with your partner? Fast food sex or gourmet sex? Your sexuality has a huge potential and sex can be absolutely amazing - also and perhaps especially during menopause. But we can not take our sexuality for granted just as we can not take our physical form for granted. Being fit does not come from sitting on the couch and neither does a well-functioning sex life. And not at all in menopause where the connection between the brain and abdomen has become a little slower. For many women, it is important to practice and make an effort to maintain the desire and pleasure of sex. The potential is that sex before and after menopause can become even more amazing, rewarding, nourishing and tender. It can turn into gourmet sex.
Gourmet sex is sex with great fervor, great love, tenderness, closeness and where there is no focus on performance only on pleasure. That potential has all sex but the older we get the more the need for intimacy and tenderness increases. I think it's a lot about maturity and the mature love that many are in, aged 40+. We are no longer so hooked on the quick gratification, the one without so many emotions. We want quality over quantity. And if you feel that longing and you have a sex life that does not come close to it, then the sex drive can be suffocated.
So one last piece of good advice is to be curious about your own sexuality.
Are there areas you have not explored? Are you in touch with your sexuality and your sexual nature as a woman? Are you flirting with your partner or, if you are single, with others? Do you feel sexy, feminine and are you happy with your body and listening to your body?
All too often the body is an appendix to our heads and we have no connection to what is happening in it and not at all to the abdomen but you can get it.
The preocuppied ambivalent and sex - do you use sex as comfort ?:
Confusing Sex and Love:: Often, individuals with Ambivalent/Anxious Attachment adaptation crave true intimacy but use sex as a means to feel loved. During adolescence, this may present as a promiscuous teen searching for Secure Attachment lacking in their childhood and caregiver relationships. The desperate need to feel constantly reassured and validated, even through false means, can temporarily provide reassurance, but may quickly fade once they are separated from their sexual partner, generating even more anxiety than before." (Diane Poole Heller)
A sextherapist/therapist says: If you use sex to feel desired and appreciated, you use sex as comfort. The dominant feelings are not lust and love, but anxiety, nervousness and the fear of being abandoned. So your primary wish is not pleasure, but security and confirmation. Sex is only a way to get this. When you use sex as comfort, it has negative consequences, which in time can destroy both your sex and love life.
The classic example: The woman who exchanges sex for love. In my work as a sexologist and a therapist, I often meet couples where the woman feels the pressure to have sex for the sake of the husband. She lacks love and attention, but the only way she can awaken the man's interest is to agree to sex. On the other hand, the man is hard at showing soreness and emotion. For him, sex is the place he's easiest to open. Both the woman and the man therefore use sex to achieve something else. The basic problem: Insecure attachment It all starts with lack of confidence in the relationship. If you are basically angry with your attatchment pattern, you doubt your partner and your relationship. You are unsure whether you can rely on your partner's love, interest and attention. The more unsafe your pattern is, the more you doubt.
If your connection pattern is nervous, you are worried about small signs of problems in the relationship. Your automated response is to reach out for your partner to make contact and confirm. Here, sex can be a way of getting attention and love.
If you only experience peace of mind in connection with sex, sex becomes obsessive. For example, if you've been scolding with your partner, you can push yourself to sex to create emotional contact and clean the air ("reconciliation"). Sex is no longer a source of joy, pleasure and love, but a way to conceal anxiety and nervousness. Forced sex destroys the desire for physical intimacy, because sex and concern do not harmonize with each other. And when sex life suffers, it goes beyond the relationship. Captive sex does not create emotional intimacy. Although there are lots of strong emotions involved in the sexual act, there is no real closeness and thus the relationship also loses one of its most important sources of cohesion, which of course has negative consequences.
Do you use sex as comfort? Perhaps you use sex as comfort without knowing it. Sex life can easily be experienced intensely and well, though it is not really driven by desire and love. Perhaps you do not know other ways of having sex and do not think it's a problem? Or maybe you've just forgotten how it feels like having sex because you really really want to?
If in doubt, consider what you long for: Sex, loving touches or something completely third?
How to get a sex life based on enjoyment; The best recipe for a sex life cleaned for comfort is to create peace of mind in your relationship. Confidence means that you dare to ask for what you really want, ie. You dare to say no to sex, and instead ask for a hug and get around. Adding a safe behavior pattern is a big thing that requires hard work, but the reward is similarly high. You become comfortable, when you find, that your partner wants you and that you are emotionally connected. When you feel connected, you are safe and you dare to be vulnerable and ask to get your needs met. The most important ways to create emotional connection are to be emotionally accessible to each other and to prioritize deep conversations.
While working on learning a safe behavior pattern, try to change your sexual habits. For example, you can start by giving priority to loving physical touch every day, ie. hold hands, hug, lie close on the sofa, etc. In this way you will find that you can get the most without first offering sex. It may even be a good idea to completely avoid sex for a period of time, so you do not fall back in a negative pattern.
You can read more about sex as comfort in Sue Johnson's book Hold Me Tight.
For Avoidantly Attached individuals, sex may have a heavy emphasis on the physical sensations rather than emotional connection. Since Avoidantly Attached individuals have difficulty expressing their needs, sex may become a way to artificially connect without fear of rejection. Avoidant partners often withdraw if they feel too vulnerable and leave their partner feeling disconnected and dissatisfied. They may also forgo sex entirely, preferring the safety of pornography and masturbation. (Diane Poole Heller)
A sextherapist/therapist says:
The problem arises when numb sex is the rule more than the exception. People who find it difficult to combine sex and feelings are afraid to be vulnerable. They can not open emotionally because they find it difficult to trust others.
It seems that it´s typically men who have impersonal sex. In the sexual encounter, men generally focus more on movement and release, whereas women are often more absorbed by emotions. But there are of course also women who have sex without feelings.
Mechanical sex in the relationship is a bad sign.
Generally, mechanical sex is bad to a relationship, because it is the feelings that create cohesion. Therefore, I always ask for the emotional connection when I give couples sexological counseling.
Sex with presence and love is one of the best binders in the relationship, and if sex life is cold and mechanical, a wedge is shot between the parties, which in the long run, will ruin the relationship.
Most long-term relationships experience periods of too much everyday life and too little proximity, love and attraction. It also appears in sex life, where sex becomes a habit or something that has to be overcome quickly. But it may be the beginning of a negative spiral because mechanical sex creates even more distance. When emotions, presence and play disappear, only mechanics are left.
4 Tips for sex with emotions: If you find that the loving feelings have left the bedroom, there is cause for concern. Sex with feelings and love is one of the most important elements in a happy and stable relationship.
Here are some tips to get your feelings back in sex life:
Massage, foreplay and hug: Hugging, massage and foreplay are great ways to practice combining emotions and body contact. Therefore, it is a good idea to give priority to loving touches and hug outside the bedroom. Instead of thinking about touch as something that will lead to sex, think of touch as a way of giving love.
Eye contact: The eyes are the mirror of the soul. Eye contact is one of the most important elements in deep emotional contact. If you think it's uncomfortable to see your partner in the eyes when you have sex, start cautiously with small periods of eye contact.
Recognize your desire: Practice feeling your desire. What do you really want? Do you really want mechanically numb sex? Are you happy, or do you feel lonely and empty? Do not do things, that you do not want. Do not be fooled with mediocre sex if it makes you unhappy. End your habit and duty!
Create emotional intimacy outside the bedroom: Sex without feelings is rarely a problem that only appears in the bed. If your sex life has become cold and impersonal, start boosting the emotional contact outside the bed, for example by prioritizing deep conversations and loving touches.
When there is openness, closeness and confidence outside the bedroom, it affects the sex life. Partners who experience peace and cohesion can openly talk about feelings and desires without fear of rejection. And in bed they dare to throw the stitches and sink into joy by having good sex with loving feelings.
Remember: Once committed some avidant partners can experience a lessening of their libido/sex drive. A once pretty sexually active partner can seem to lose interest sexually. Be careful not to take this personally. They would be this way with anyone and it has to do with them coming from families where there was not a lot of physical closeness. Now that you have become "deep family" to them they start to unconsciously revert back to the patterns of their childhood attachments, which probably did not include a lot of close physical contact. Of course you can continue to ask for physical contact but be patient with them and try to find ways of approaching that don't provoke a defensive response in your avoidant partner. Also be careful not to trigger a shame response when discussing this with your partner as they tend to feel ashamed and embarrassed about letting their partner down in this way. (Stan Tatkin)
They can often have exstreme sex: being promisquious, bsdm, S/M, over/underdog dynamics, or they can be scared of sex. Some can be very sexual/sensual.
People often say, that it is the best sex they ever had, having sex with a person with some desorganised attatchmentstyle.
They can be promiscuous. They can be scared of sex You can use it as confirmation and be uncritical about who you are having sex with. You can have sex with many people Through sex they can experience closeness. Power / powerlessness. Bondage, s / m sex ect. Pain can be a way to relive past traumas. One may have a tendency to maintain the high nervous system arousel when having extreme sex. If the tension goes down, they may believe, that they are dying on the instinctive level. Sex with a secure person can feel boring.
Shame vs. shamelessness Sex can be grounded with shame. Some are ashamed of their body. Also if you had been sexually abused. Or some may be shameless. You are shameless to yourself if you are being promiscues.
Because of their unregulated nerveussystem, sex often has to be more exstreme before they can feel anything.
Our body can show what happend to us and where we got stuck in our development as a child. If you've got some of the rigid character structure which developed around 4-6 years old, you can have a split between your heart and your sex. You've got rejected by the opposite sex parent.
You are either able to have sex with or you can love your partner. But it is not possible to combine the two together at the same time. Either one is good at opening one's heart or one is good at being sexual and seductive. Both gives problem in relationships. This can only be healed in a relationship. (The fifth caracter structure)
Can you say “I am horny!”… Without hesitation, doubt or the slightest resistance? We need to take our light home where we are not yet completely free. In some rooms in the castle, the door flies up effortlessly when we touch the handle. And then there are the spaces, where there is more resistance.
What is in the shadows is, what we have shut down to feel or feel a little anxious about . Or embarrassed, shy ect about.
Lust. You know yourself best how you feel about that word. Whether you get excited, curious, annoyed or provoked.
“Some have grown up in a time when sexuality was still taboo, or in a home where one has never seen father and mother naked, or where sex has not been talked about and sexual desire has been shamed. Maybe it has never been said directly, but has just been in the air that sex was dirty or something you should at least keep as a secret.
A child who explores his own body and is met with disgust, scolding, or shame will no doubt take his healthy, natural sexuality and put it in the shade/shadow. A child who has grown up with a very liberated and promiscuous parent, can go into the opposite direction, and overcompensate by being extra buttoned up and cranky. People who have been sexually abused ect are at greater risk of putting their sexuality in the corner of shame. Teenage girls with great sexual appetites are more often than teenage boys shamed, done wrong or called cheap. It is still a little more legitimate for a man to be horny, than it is for a woman. We may have learned to put a lid on our sexuality, lust and horniness in childhood or adolescence, but sexuality can also be overshadowed over time or in special periods. Maybe we have had free, happy access to our sexuality once, but may have shut down after a crisis in the relationship or after a period of stress, depression, illness, or childbirth. There can be many reasons why you turn off or turn down your sexuality, but you can - right now - choose to take your light home again in this part of your life
There can be many reasons why, you turn off or turn down your sexuality, but you can - right now - choose to take your light home again in this area.
Many women want to acknowledge their lust, but not their horniness. It's too ugly, animalistic, vulgar. But you can not get an orgasm without being horny. If we are to be able to enjoy and want to experience ecstasy, sexual liberation and all-consuming satisfaction, we must - also - embrace and accommodate the lust as a healthy and natural part of us.
” Think about your sexuality. How free do you have to be sexually? Are you allowed to feel it? How much desire can you have? Is it OK. to want sex but not to be horny? Do you set boundaries yourself - or are there things you do not do because you think you should not? Do you need to take some light home in this area ?
Low estrogen During menopause, women may find that as estrogen decreases, so does their sex drive. Lower estrogen will often lead to decreased sensitivity around the clitoris, vaginal dryness, less blood flow to the vagina and more difficulty in achieving orgasm . ———
A mature couple has been out to eat, had some wine, looked each other in the eyes, and a wonderful moment has arisen. A crack in everyday life and routines. They laugh and flirt and fall over on the bed and kiss. Jo’s husband, Rob (played by Christopher Eccleston), then goes straight to the point, pulling the panties off her and put his hand down between his wife’s legs. Here he discovers that she is not wet and that the sudden touch hurts her and then says something along the lines of: "I think we will need the good old…", while he finds a tube of lube.
Vaginal dryness is definitely not something we usually see treated in popular culture. It's more something that girlfriends whisper to each other or do discrete google searches on. In any case, I have never seen the subject covered on TV before, maybe a little with Samantha in ‘Sex and The City’, but not quite down in the panties as with the scene in ‘Close to me’.
In porn, women are almost always poked and pushed into lube as something naughty and part of a game, while there is a whimsical contrast between the non-needs of young porn models and the very tangible needs of mature women for add moisture.
Back to ‘Close to me’ where Rob asks Jo if he should lubricate and she says no, gets embarrassed and angry and starts lubricating herself. And cut. The opportunity has passed and we sense that there will be no more hanky panky happening that night.
But what would have happened if the two people had given themselves a little more time and space for the new vulnerability that has moved into their love life? If Rob had been less busy, if Jo had felt less wrong. If they had a language for what Jo is experiencing?
Menopause is a 10-year period in all women's lives, where everything changes physically, mentally, physically, but which is still invisible and taboo, and that is why it is so important that a beautiful, strong, sexy woman like Connie Nielsen takes menopause with her. into h this TV series
Connie Nielsen herself has said in interviews that she thought it was important to show a woman's menopause. For Jo is a woman in crisis, but she is also a woman in transition from one phase to the next. We feel her pain over the children moving away from home. That she is suddenly in the grandmother category. She fills, like so many other mature women, her newfound time with book club, girlfriends and volunteer work, while at the same time she mourns a disappearing desire and misses a look at herself that she has been used to in the first part of his female life. She fantasizes about young men. About sudden sex and surprising lust while lying sweaty and sleepless at night, rejecting her husband's slightly clumsy touches.